


Zoo times

by AnnaTheHank



Series: A/C/G ot3 [17]
Category: Good Omens (TV)
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Multi, Zoo, lil bit of emotional turmoil, lots o snakes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-04
Updated: 2019-09-04
Packaged: 2020-10-06 21:24:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,247
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20513726
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnnaTheHank/pseuds/AnnaTheHank
Summary: To help distract Gabriel from what's going on, Aziraphale and Crowley take him to the zoo. After which, Crowley hatches a brilliant scheme.





	Zoo times

**Author's Note:**

> HI ALL  
Sorry this took so long! I was on vacation last week and told myself 'more time to write' but it ended up being 'more time to play video games' :D  
But! the zoo is here!!!! Thank you to everyone who helped provide ideas and fodder for this fic.   
I think I'm gonna do the ring fic next, which features pre-cannon heaven memories, labels, and a group of teens that like to hang out at the book shop after school.

Crowley had been enjoying a nice evening of sleep when he felt someone in the room. He opened his eyes, knowing instinctively that it was too early for Aziraphale to be home. He relaxed a bit upon seeing Gabriel by the door.

“I’m sorry,” Gabriel said, closing the door softly. “I didn’t mean to wake you.”

Crowley curled himself closer around Anthony Jr. and yawned. Then he realized what he was doing and he sat up a bit, looking down at the stuffed snake.

“He must have fallen down,” Crowley said, waving his hand at the snake, forcing it back up to its place above the bed. He chuckled nervously. “Happens a lot.”

Gabriel seemed to pay it no mind, holding up the covers and crawling into the bed. Crowley was both confused and pleasantly surprised at the Archangel’s forwardness. He laid back down, snuggling up to Gabriel’s side.

“Where’s Aziraphale?” Gabriel asked, his arms wrapping around Crowley.

Crowley closed his eyes. “Book club.”

“Book club?”

“Yeah. Some guys came in wanting to buy a book cause it was like, an old copy or something and they wanted to do a comparison. And obviously he’s not just going to sell them a book. But he appreciated their ‘academic endeavors’ so agreed to let them borrow it as long as he was there.”

“How kind of him.”

Crowley hummed and nodded, snuggling closer. Gabriel’s hand rubbed up and down his arm. Crowley opened his eyes and looked up at him. Gabriel was staring at the ceiling, his face blank.

“What’s got you so zombied?” Crowley asked.

Gabriel didn’t look at him or move his face. “Hm?”

Crowley sighed and pushed himself up a bit so he could lean over Gabriel. “What’s on your mind?”

Gabriel blinked, his eyes focusing a bit. “It’s nothing.”

Crowley frowned and flopped back down, his head resting on Gabriel’s chest. “I know I’m not an angel,” he said. “But you can still talk to me about shit.”

Gabriel tangled his fingers in Crowley’s hair. “What was it like?” he asked.

Crowley rolled his eyes. “What was what like?”

“Falling.”

The room went silent. Crowley didn’t move, letting Gabriel’s fingers rub gently against his scalp. He took a deep breath. “Well, it wasn’t a walk in the park.”

“Did it hurt?”

“No, it was like skipping through a fucking field of flowers.”

Gabriel’s hand stilled. “I’m sorry,” he whispered. Then he actually tried to get up.

Crowley growled and forced him back down, pinning his shoulders down and glaring at him. “You’re not going to fall, okay? If you were you would have by now!”

Gabriel blinked at him. “Okay.”

Crowley sighed and fell back down, curling up a bit. “Look, just, get some sleep okay? You can’t think about bad shit when you’re asleep and then you can talk about it with Aziraphale in the morning.”

“I’m sorry,” Gabriel said, wrapping his arms back around him. “I shouldn’t have brought it up.”

Crowley sighed, feeling a little guilty at his reaction. “I just...don’t like to think about it.”

“Understandable.”

They settled into another silence, but Crowley couldn’t seem to sleep, no matter how soothing Gabriel’s heartbeat was or how calming the rise and fall of his chest was. He still just felt bad. 

“Look, you’re fine,” he said. “Trust me. If God was going to cast you out for not using the bloody horn She would have done it by now.”

Crowley felt Gabriel nod. He grumbled. He knew Gabriel needed to talk to Aziraphale because Aziraphale always knew what to say. Crowley never knew what to say and, as always, he couldn’t help but feel he had made things worse. Now Gabriel would never talk to him about anything. Which, he figured, was probably best for the angel.

Crowley screwed his eyes tight and fell asleep to the wish that Aziraphale would come walking through the door any second.

-

Crowley felt Gabriel slip away from him in the morning. He groaned and curled under the blankets for a moment before tossing them to the side and rolling out of bed. He wanted to just go back to sleep and ignore the world some more but he had to make sure Gabriel was okay.

Remembering to think up a robe before descending the stairs, Crowley followed the shuffling sounds of Gabriel’s feet to the kitchen. Aziraphale was standing in the doorway, hands fidgeting as he watched Gabriel start to make a pot of coffee.

“How was book club?” Crowley asked, joining Aziraphale in the doorway, staring out at Gabriel.

“Something’s wrong,” Aziraphale whispered. He glanced over at Crowley. “Did he say anything to you?”

Crowley scratched at the back of his neck. “He, uh...I think he’s worried.” He looked at Aziraphale. “About falling.”

Aziraphale sighed, looking at the ground. “Oh dear. I’m afraid I know all too well how he feels.”

Crowley put his hands in the pockets of his robe and leaned against the frame. “What did you do to get over it?”

“Well, usually, when it got bad, I would go out to lunch or dinner. Something to distract myself.”

Crowley nodded, looking back at Gabriel. He furrowed his eyebrows. The angel was over filling a mug with coffee, not seeming to notice. “We gotta distract him soon.”

Aziraphale hummed. “Where haven’t we taken him yet.” They both sat there thinking for a moment. “I know! The zoo!”

Crowley gave him a look. “Angel, it’s like, negative degrees outside. The zoo’s probably closed. Or if it isn’t, all the animals are probably inside.”

Aziraphale smiled. “I think you’ll find it’s uncharacteristically warm for this time of year.”

Smirking, Crowley looked out the kitchen window to find that the clouds of the morning had parted. He scoffed. “Sounds like we’re going to the zoo.”

-

It was still relatively cold when they arrived. If it had suddenly been springtime weather there would have been concerns. But it was just warm enough that some brave families would travel out and the animals would feel comfortable lazing about in the sun.

Aziraphale grabbed Crowley’s arm as they entered the park and Gabriel couldn’t help but notice it. He wished that Aziraphale was holding his arm, that he was feeling the warmth and love he radiated. But he wasn’t. So Gabriel placed his hands in his pockets (a habit he was picking up from Crowley, much like sleeping) and walked with them through the park.

Gabriel didn’t really see the appeal of it. He didn’t understand why Aziraphale’s eyes lit up at every exhibit, tugging on Gabriel’s sleeve to point out every animal. They had seen them all before, in the garden, not behind bars. But Aziraphale was smiling the whole time and he loved to see him smile, so he went along with it.

Things got interesting when the passed the bird enclosure. They had originally planned to skip it, as Gabriel pointed out that they could see birds more easily in the wild. But then Aziraphale saw the sign outside.

“Wait!” he said, pulling back on Crowley’s arm. “Look!”

Crowley and Gabriel followed his gaze to the sign that announced one could now purchase bird feed to feed the birds with. Crowley smiled and led the way over, Gabriel frowning a bit as he followed. How was he supposed to lament over his past mistakes and obsess over the future if Aziraphale and Crowley kept distracting him?

“You want some?” Crowley asked, purchasing the one bag and handing it to Aziraphale.

“No, thank you,” Gabriel said. 

Crowley nodded, bought a second bag, and shoved it into Gabriel’s hands. Gabriel sighed and followed them into the enclosure.

The birds were frisky, flying about and chirping incessantly. Gabriel found it a little annoying but before he could say anything Aziraphale slid up next to him, placing a hand on his arm. 

“Would you like to feed them with me?” he asked. 

Gabriel really couldn’t say no to those eyes, he noticed. It was infuriating. 

Aziraphale opened his bag and poured the contents into one hand, holding it out above the walkway they were on. Birds peeked their heads out from the trees and chirped a bit, bouncing closer down the branches. Gabriel glanced back at Crowley, who was doing a very good job of making sure those who passed weren’t at all interested in seeing the birds at that moment.

“Come on,” Aziraphale said, leaning over the railing a bit and gesturing to the birds with the hand. 

A little blue bird chirped and hoped from the branch onto Aziraphale’s hand. Aziraphale giggled and nodded his head as the bird bent down to peck at the food. The other birds from the tree joined in, surrounding Aziraphale’s hand, and resting on his arm. Before long he had attracted the attention of more birds. He was covered with color, the birds waiting on his arms and shoulders to get a chance to peck at his hand. He laughed as they chirped and moved around on him. 

A little black bird with a bright red line of feathers running down the center landed on Gabriel’s shoulder. It looked from the crowd on Aziraphale’s arm to Gabriel’s hand, and chirped.

“Oh,” Gabriel said. “Yes.” He opened his bag and held it out to the bird. The bird leaned forward, trying to peck at the food, only to be blocked by the plastic that folded back in. Gabriel hummed and reached in, pulling out a seed and holding it up to the bird. The bird shot forward and snagged the seed out of Gabriel’s hand. 

After it ate it, the bird chirped in the direction of Aziraphale and a few waiting birds hopped over, surprising Gabriel as they landed on his arm. He pulled out seeds, one by one, holding them up to the birds in turn.

Aziraphale chuckled, birds still clinging to him as he turned to face Gabriel. “Like this, darling.” He grabbed Gabriel’s hand and held it open, taking the bag from his grip. He poured the feed out and the birds followed, hooking onto his hand to eat.

It was strange. Gabriel had watched the animals be made, had observed them in the garden, but he had never taken care of them. He had never fed them. That was Adam and Eve’s job. It felt odd, too, the little scrapes of their beaks against his skin. He was providing them life and nourishment. He was doing the job of a human. He was being human.

And, he figured, if he was human...he couldn’t fall.

All too soon the feed was gone and the birds returned to their trees. All except for the black and red one that remained on Gabriel’s shoulder. He glanced at the door to make sure Crowley was still there, and not somehow messing with him. But he was there, a small smile on his face as he looked at them.

“Come on,” Gabriel said, holding his hand out to the bird. “I can’t take you with me, I’m afraid.” It tilted its head at the hand then hopped on, letting Gabriel carry him over to the tree. It hopped off, chirping a bit before disappearing into the leaves.

Aziraphale smiled and grabbed Gabriel’s arm, leading him back out to the rest of the zoo. And he didn’t let go.

-

“If you liked the birds,” Aziraphale said, “Then you simply have to see the petting zoo?”

“They have a zoo inside of a zoo?” Gabriel asked. Aziraphale’s hands were warm on his arm, and he was aware of how close Crowley walked to him, wishing he had the courage to reach out and grab his hand. 

“Ironic, isn’t it,” Crowley said, laughing a bit.

“It’s a lovely little place where they put all the more tame animals, and you get to actually go in and pet them!” Aziraphale led them down a little walkway. “It’s marvelous.”

“Like...cats and dogs?” Gabriel asked. His answer was around the corner.

A little barn sat on one end of a field, a fence surrounding the outside. Inside the pasture was a grouping of sheep, goats, miniature horses, and even a few rabbits bouncing around.

“Aren’t they just charming?” Aziraphale asked, hugging Gabriel’s arm closer as he gave a contented sigh.

“Oh, yeah,” Crowley said, watching as two goat kids butted heads. “Now we’re talking.” He took off, climbing over the fence.

“Crowley!” Aziraphale shouted, chasing after him. He went through the gate. “Absolutely no fighting with the animals!”

“But it helps them learn,” Crowley said, coming to a stop with a pout. Gabriel slowly followed them into the pasture.

“If they fight with each other, yes,” Aziraphale said. “But you, stay out of it.”

Crowley frowned and a nearby kid bleated, gently ramming his head against Crowley’s leg. Crowley gestured at the kid and gave Aziraphale a look. Aziraphale shook his head at him and Crowley grumbled, scowling at the animal and sulking away.

“Don’t be shy, dear,” Aziraphale said, reaching a hand out to Gabriel. 

Gabriel took it and let Aziraphale lead him over to a particularly round and fluffy brown sheep. Keeping a strong hold on Gabriel’s wrist, Aziraphale pulled his arm over to the animal, placing his hand on soft fluff.

Gabriel was entranced, watching his hand disappear into the wool. It was softer than he thought it would be. It slid between his fingers as Aziraphale let go and Gabriel petted the sheep on his own. 

There was a desperate bleating sound and Aziraphale sighed, rolling his eyes slightly as he wandered over to Crowley, who was whispering to the goats while pointing at them and scowling. 

Gabriel felt a gentle nudge against his leg and turned to find a second sheep had wandered over. The sheep nudged him again, baaing at him. Gabriel reached back, placing his other hand against their head, feeling the soft wool on the palm of his hand. The sheep baaed again, seeming to enjoy the petting.

Gabriel hopped forward, feeling a third nudge against his back. He looked over his shoulder. Two other sheep were looking at him expectantly. He spun around, turning his pets to the newcomers.

But the other two sheep didn’t like that. They butted against his side, baaing for his attention, while yet another sheep wandered over. He was completely surrounded.

“Aziraphale,” Gabriel whispered, worried a loud voice might upset the animals around him. “I think I need some assistance.”

“Oh dear.” 

Aziraphale was holding a red-faced Crowley back from the gang of goats. He dragged him away, Crowley pointing at the goats as they left. 

“Perhaps that’s enough petting zoo for today.” He patted two of the sheep, seeming to sate their need, and Gabriel was able to squirm out from the crowd.

Aziraphale led the grumbling Crowley and the now-paranoid-there-was-a-sheep-behind-him Gabriel out of the enclosure.

-

“Alright,” Crowley said as they finished up their tour of the zoo. “‘Bout time to head back, huh?”

“Oh, no,” Aziraphale said. “We still have the reptile house to visit.”

Crowley groaned, rolling his head back. “Angel,” he whined. 

“Come now.” Aziraphale released Gabriel’s arm and grabbed Crowley, dragging him off towards the house near the exit. “I thought you liked to see all the reptiles.”

“It’s embarrassing,” Crowley said through gritted teeth, a tinge of pink in his cheeks as he glanced over at Gabriel.

“Nonsense.”

Gabriel was, like Crowley, itching to get back home. But Crowley’s reaction to the reptile house intrigued him. Crowley was, after all, a serpent. (A wily one if Aziraphale had anything to say about it). Following them inside, he wondered what about his serpentess made him embarrassed by the reptile house. 

It was a fairly large, open room. Glass windows lined the walls, showing off different habitats, some large and other small. Snakes, lizards, frogs, and other reptiles filled up the space, and humans pressed eager faces against the glass to get a look at them. 

Crowley grumbled, shoving his hands in his pockets and scrunching his head down as Aziraphale led them around the room. The snakes in the exhibit would lift their head whenever he was near, eyeing him up with interest.

“Cool!” a kid said, running up to the exhibit and pointing at the young corn snake. “She’s looking right at ya!”

Aziraphale chuckled and Crowley’s face went bright red, turning to look away. The snake continued to follow Crowley’s attention until he was out of their sight, returning to a curled up slumber.

Near the exit a zookeeper was standing next to an open exhibit, a long bull snake draped over her shoulders. Groups of humans passed by, the brave ones accepting her offer to pet the snake, claiming he really was quite safe.

Aziraphale gasped and hurried over, Crowley groaning and trailing after him.

“Hello there, handsome,” Aziraphale said, reaching out and petting the scales between the snake’s eyes. The snake rose its head, relishing in his attention.

Then Crowley approached.

The snake looked at him and then shot forward, over the keepers shoulders and up Aziraphale’s arm in an attempt to get closer to Crowley. The keeper reached up, grabbing the body of the snake and pulling him back. He squiggled in her arms, trying to get loose.

“Sorry,” the keeper said, forcing the snake back into his exhibit. “He’s usually very tame.”

“Oh, perfectly alright,” Aziraphale said, smiling at her. 

Crowley grumbled and grabbed the back of Aziraphale’s coat, dragging him out not just out of the house, but out of the whole zoo, Aziraphale chuckling softly.

-

“You’ll stay the night, won’t you?” Aziraphale asked. He had those eyes again. Those same eyes that had convinced Gabriel to stay for first lunch, then a show, and then dinner. Now it was trying to convince him to a sleepover.

“I really should get back,” Gabriel said, looking away. He learned that as long as he didn’t look at Aziraphale, he could avoid the hold he had over him.

“Oh.” His voice dripped with disappointment. Gabriel sighed, risking a glance at him. If he thought the begging eyes were bad, it was nothing compared to the look on his face now.

“But,” Gabriel said, sighing. “I suppose it wouldn’t hurt.”

Aziraphale’s face brightened. “Oh, good! Why don’t I make us some coffee?”

Gabriel nodded, already upset with himself for giving in to easily. Aziraphale nodded and headed towards the kitchen. Gabriel shook his head and followed him.

“Gabriel!” Crowley grabbed his arm and pulled him in between the shelves of books, looking after Aziraphale to make sure he wasn’t lagging behind. “I need your help.”

Gabriel was pressed against the bookshelf. “What’s wrong?”

“I’m breaking them out.” Crowley released Gabriel and took off his glasses, staring at him with wide, yellow eyes.

Gabriel raised an eyebrow. “Them who?”

“The snakes,” Crowley hissed. “They deserve freedom and space! Not-not those tiny little glass cages!”

Gabriel tilted his head. “They seemed perfectly content to me.”

Crowley pointed at him. “That’s what they want you to think!”

Gabriel blinked at him. “So...what do you want me to do about it?”

Crowley smiled, grabbed Gabriel’s coat. “Help me break them out!”

“Why don’t you just, miracle them free?”

Crowley gasped, stepping back with a hand on his chest. “Gabriel! I’m shocked. Are you insinuating that I would use something as precious as a miracle on something like this.”

Gabriel rolled his eyes. “If I help you will you shut up?”

“Absolutely.”

“Fine.”

Crowley leaned out into the store. “Hey, angel!” He called into the kitchen. “We’re going to go get dessert! We’ll be back!”

“Chocolates sound lovely,” Aziraphale answered. 

Snickering, Crowley drove Gabriel back to the zoo.

-

It was all very easy, actually. The way Crowley saw it, a break in involved cutting some fence with wire cutters, sneaking around behind the backs of guards, and then being home free once you were inside a building. And so that’s exactly how it went.

Crowley found the convenient key in the back room of the reptile house and started opening the exhibits. The snakes immediately rushed towards him, crawling up his legs and hanging off whatever part of his body he could fit them. Eventually he was swarming with them and Gabriel took over, releasing the rest.

“Alright, alright, calm down,” Crowley said. He hissed and the pile of snakes stopped slithering, each pair of eyes looking at him with rapt attention. “Now. I’m getting you out of here, but you have to behave, alright?”

Gabriel could swear he saw the snakes nod. 

“What do you think you’re doing?”

Crowley and Gabriel both startled, looking towards the door. Aziraphale was standing there, arms crossed, foot tapping on the floor. He was glaring at them.

“Uh, Aziraphale! Fancy seeing you here.” Crowley smiled, holding up his arms, dripping with scales.

Aziraphale sighed and shook his head. “Honestly. I expect this from you, dear, but Gabriel.” Another shake of the head. “I can’t see why you would go along with this.”

Gabriel shrugged. He wasn’t entirely sure either. Part of him had been curious to see the snakes reacting to Crowley again. Another part of him wanted to relive the slight moments of peace that being at the zoo had offered him earlier. With no explanation to speak of, he felt quite sheepish saying nothing at all.

“Go on then,” Aziraphale sad, gesturing to the exhibits. “Put them away.”

“But, angel!”

Aziraphale held up a hand, stopping his further arguments. “We’ve had this discussion before, dear. You know well by now that most of these snakes will not survive on their own in the wild. It’s best they stay here, where they can be taken care of.”

Crowley huffed and frowned, starting to put the snakes away.

“Every time,” Aziraphale whispered to Gabriel as the two of them helped him wrangle the snakes to their proper exhibits.

-

Crowley was in a sour mood the whole way home. He did stop somewhere to grab chocolates thogh, handing them to Aziraphale without a word. When they got back to the shop he huffed and went straight upstairs.

“Don’t worry about him,” Aziraphale said, taking off his coat. “He’s just sulking because he got caught.”

“Should we...check on him?” Gabriel asked. He knew Crowley liked to act out for attention. Maybe this whole plan was an attempt at that.

“Why don’t you go keep him company and I’ll be up with coffee and desserts in a minute.”

Gabriel nodded.   
Crowley was standing on the side of the room, arms folded, scowling.

“I’m sorry your rescue attempt didn’t go well,” he said, standing before him, wondering if he should reach out to comfort him in some way. 

Crowley sighed, his body and face relaxing. “Yeah, well, he’s mostly right anyway.”

“How do you mean?”

“Well, most of the snakes there have been around since they were young. They probably might have some trouble in the wild.”

“Oh.” Gabriel reached into his coat pocket. “So, I guess we should take this back.”

Crowley looked down at the albino corn snake in Gabriel’s hand. He smiled. “Gabriel, I’m impressed.”

The snake flicked its tongue out and Crowley held his hand out, letting the little one crawl into his palm. She was probably only a few weeks old. 

“Well, we can’t take her back now,” Crowley said. “She must stay as a testament to the time Gabriel, archangel of heaven, stole from the zoo.”

Gabriel frowned. When he put it like that, it was quite the wrong thing to do. He really did deserve to fall. All that stood between him and Hell was time. And he didn’t know how much time, which made every moment of existing pure agony.

Crowley laughed. “How human of you.”

Gabriel furrowed his eyebrows. “What?”

“Demons would have left them behind to suffer, angels would say it’s helping them. Only a human would go and steal one, with all the purpose of setting them free.”

Gabriel nodded a bit. That made sense. And human was good. It wasn’t as good as angel, but it was much better than demon. He could work with that.

“I suppose that makes you human, too,” he said, following Crowley to the other side of the room where a snake habitat had appeared. 

Crowley let the snake crawl into the cage and then placed the top on it. He shrugged. “Suppose so.”

Gabriel smiled a bit. Human. Below angel, but above demon. They could both be human. That would suit them just fine.

“So,” Crowley spun around. “What are you gonna name her?”

“Oh no. She’s all yours,” Gabriel said. “You name her.”

Crowley pursed his lips and looked down at the snake, that looked back at him, head to the side a bit. 

Aziraphale arrived before he could announce his decision. He was carrying a tray with three mugs and a pile of chocolates on it. He looked at the snake, and then between the two of them. He shook his head a bit but said nothing as he settled down on the couch.

Crowley chuckled and joined him, grabbing a handful of chocolate as he laid down on Aziraphale’s lap. Gabriel picked up a mug, Crowley lifting his legs so Gabriel could sit down, the comfortable weight of those legs on his lap.

It was a cozy scene. And in her new home, not far away, Gabrielle slept peacefully.


End file.
